I'm not the kind of guy who can just
lie around, even when I convince myself that I deserve it.
Take yesterday – Wednesday – for
instance. I red-eyed out of San Francisco to Atlanta and then from
Atlanta to Greenville, SC. My flight to Atlanta left at 11:30 p.m.
West Coast time and landed in Atlanta around 6:30 a.m. by the East
Coast clock. Then I had to amuse myself in Atlanta for about 90
minutes before boarding my 29-minute flight for Greenville.
The old latch and lock on the bottom with the new latch and lock on top. No, it's no from the redundant school of redundancy. |
I walked in my door before 10 a.m., and
that included a cameo at the grocery store to pick up a few things on
my way home.
Although the sky was a little overcast
when I first landed in Greenville, within an hour, the sun was
blasting through. I knew I had to mow my dirt either the day I
arrived home or the next because I am scheduled to fly again on
Friday. I had a two-day window to get the mowing done.
I'm not a mow-once-a-week homeowner.
What's the point? My lawn/moonscape/missile-testing range looks like
crap mowed or not. It does look marginally better trimmed than it
does when out of control, but only marginally.
Nope, I'm a mow-once-every-10-days
person. My 10 days expired on Monday and it was now Wednesday. Time
was running out.
So, despite being dog tired – I had
several pops of Templeton Rye in VW's hospitality suite before
heading to the airport in hopes it would help me sleep; it didn't;
so, yesterday morning I was groggy and tired – I decided to go
ahead and mow the dirt, first thing after getting home. Besides, I
reasoned, Thursday's weather might be bad and then what would I do?
The weeds screamed to be cut!
Donning my yard-work attire, I got
ready to head outside. Pulling open the kitchen drawer where I keep
the keys for the lock on my shed – yes, I have a shed – I made a
tragic discovery: no keys. Wait, let me try that again: NO KEYS!
I
didn't panic, not immediately anyway. Sometimes I just forget to put
them back, in which case they run through the washer and dryer safely
in the pocket of my yard-work shorts, or wind up in the bottom of the
washer. I checked both; nada.
I
searched every nook and cranny where I could imagine absent mindedly
placing or accidentally dropping them. Fifteen minutes of searching
produced zero results.
I
didn't have time for this crap. The clock was ticking.
Going
to one of my tool boxes – yes, I have tool boxes – I grabbed a
crowbar and a 20-pound hammer. My plan was to pry the door-side of
the latch off the door. Ten minutes, a gallon of sweat and a string
of profanity that would have made my dad proud later, I gave up that
idea. The door-frame side of the latch proved equally as stubborn. At
this point I had wasted 45 minutes without breaching the shed's
defenses.
I
headed back into the house and retrieved my power drill – yes, I
have a power drill, two, in fact – with the intention of removing
the hinges from the door. I returned with not only my drill, but a
container of drill bits and a 50-foot extension cord.
Where's there's a will, there's a way. Removing the door from its hinges allowed me to reach the screws holding the latch to the door frame. |
I had
the door off its hinges in two minutes. Flipping the door around
exposed the heads of the screws holding the frame side of the latch
in place. Removing those, the latch swung free. I rehung the door,
which now opened.
Of
course, I could no longer lock it. Grabbing my gas can, I headed off
to get fuel for the mower and a new lock and latch at Home Depot.
Tick-tock....tick-tock.....
I
rolled back into my driveway about 20 minutes later with gas and
supplies. Attaching the new latch required about 10 minutes. No
worries there.
Finally,
about two and a half hours after I first pulled open the drawer to
get the keys, I was ready to mow.
Yep,
my 90 minute dirt mowing chore morphed into well over four hours.
Although
the new latch and lock cost me about 17 bucks, I did find a $10 bill
on the ground at the gas station, so I had that going for me.
Sweeeeet!
Oh,
and at least I made the correct choice. Rain began falling last
evening and continued all day today. A brilliant call, yes?
I'm surprised you didn't find the key after you went through all that.
ReplyDeleteI think they are in the weeds somewhere having popped out of my pocket when I pulled my phone or something out.
ReplyDelete